Pirates VS Ninja's
by phantomrose23
Summary: Jack is chased by fangirls, Elizabeth's butt can spin like mad, and we learn that Will cannot be trusted in an emergancy situation. What happens when Jack is pummled by adoring fans? Who comes to the rescue but an international man of mystery, Yeah baby!


Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story...duh...I am only writing this as a tribute to all those crazy pirate fangirls out there. It's 100 unserious so don't get mad at me if your favorite character is...how do I put it...out of proportion? If you do feel you need to say something, feel free. Keep in mind though that my ship can handle any storm. Enjoy for the most part...or don't...whatever.

ONE SHOT

Elizabeth, in her air-headed way, skipped over to Will, throwing her arms around his neck. "Oh William I love you so. You are such an amazing blacksmith slash pirate."

"I am not a pirate," he defended, lost in her eyes.

"You've been saying that since the first movie, but here you are, all pirate like." Will would have rolled his eyes if he wasn't so infatuated with the govorner's daughter. He leaned in to kiss her when the door behind them burst open. Elizabeth quickly pulled away, eyes fixated on Jack.

"Ah if it isn't William and his bonney lass."

"Jack," Will nodded. Elizabeth's eyes danced over Jack's body, something Will did not seem to notice. He did however notice the woman clinging to Jack's arm. "Who is this?"

Jack glanced at the bubbly woman. "Oh, this is Madison from the States."

"The States?"

"She is one of my fangirls."

Elizabeth flashed a subtle glare at the girl.

"Hi!" Madison blurted, bouncing on her heels. "It's great to be here. I LOVE ALL OF YOU! Your posters are on my walls and-"

"What did I say about speaking love?" Jack asked her, hoping she would quiet her high voice.

"Ooh sorry..._love_," she added with a giggle.

"She seems...nice," Will attempted. Madison couldn't help but gaze at Jack, her face only a few inches from him.

"And what did I mention about 'personal space'?"

"Right." Madison pulled back a little, her hands digging into Jack's arm.

"What is it that you need?" Elizabeth suddenly spoke.

"I need-"

"There he is!!! It's Jack!!!" A group of about 21 teenage girls stood together, giggles filling the air. They began bouncing, faces blushing with excitment.

"A place to hide-oh buggah. There's the rest of em." Jack, with his arms outstretched in the air, raced through the house, trying to find a way out.

"Jack! Come back! We love you!" The herd of girls stampeded through the house, screaming Jack's name.

Will held Elizabeth close to him, afraid she would get swept away in the madness. After they passed he asked, overly concerned, "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. Remember I now know how to fight with swords and spin fancy. Wanna see me spin?"

"Ummm Elizabeth I don't think-"

"WHEE!!!!!" She began twirling, head peeking over her shoulder to watch her butt as she spun. "Look at it go!!!"

"Elizabeth, darling, I don't think-"

"I said watch it spin!"

She twirled faster until she tripped over her own two left feet. Elizabeth went flying through the air, smacking her head on a banister.

"Elizabeth!" Will rushed over to her, lungs inhaling and exhaling at amazing speeds. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." She sat up, rubbing her forehead.

"You look pale."

"Will, I'm all right," she tried assuring him.

"Your hallucinating! I need to get you to a hospital and quick!"

"No I'm-"

"Shuddup before you pass out. I don't need you dying on me!" He began to shake her violenly, with tears streaming down his face. "Don't die on me, you better not die on me!"

"Stop it, your giving me a headache."

"Oh god, Elizabeth STAY AWAY FROM THE LIGHT!" Will smacked her then dropped her on the staircase. "Are you alright?"

"YES! I'm...wait I need to see a doctor," she lied.

"Oh you're fine, it's just a bump. Nothing time can't heal."

Elizabeth crinkled her eyebrows at the blacksmith slash pirate.

A rumbling in the earth made them forget their dispute. Jack yelled into the air as he rushed passed the two out the front door.The group of giggling fangirls raced after him, leaving behind them a trail of dust.

"We better help Jack." Elizabeth suddenly concluded.

"Why do we always have to help him? He's got his fanclub chasing him around, he doesn't need us."

"He looks so unhappy," pouted Elizabeth.

"Did you say spagetti?"

"This situation has nothing to do with pasta, and I don't care how hungry you are!" She snapped.

"Well maybe I wouldn't be so hungry if you actually cooked a decent meal..."

"What was that?"

Will began to whistle, eyes fixated on the ceiling.

"That's what I thought. Now come."

They ran outside, Will reluctantly following Elizabeth. Jack stood cornered in well, a corner.

"All right, back away from Jack!" Elizabeth started pulling out a cutlass from its holdings that was previously not there. The fangirls eyes suddenly turned black as they all slowly turned to face her. Thunder clapped on the previously sunny day, lightening striking in the background.

"What did you tell us, pirate wannabe?" They all said as clones.

"You heard me, he's mine! I mean-" Elizabeth glanced at Will who didn't seem to notice her slip up yet again.

"He will never be yours, no matter how many of us may write it. He's _ours_." In a totally Hollywood and synchronized way, they began backflipping and cartwheeling around the premises like in some Bruce Lee Epic.

"Ah crap. They know karate?"

"Ummm Elizabeth...You do know that no pirate can beat a ninja right? How do you think Blackbeird died?" Will whispered in her ear.

"Well, that's all fine and dandy. But there's something you don't know about me. That none of you know about me...I'm not really the daughter of a semi-rich man...I am really...BARBOSA!!!" She reached for a zipper on the back of her neck and unzipped the skin suit. Before them all stood Barbosa.

"How did I miss _that_?!" Will asked himself.

"Argh," he simply said.

"Well I hate to break it to you Barbosa, but you are a pirate and again like dear William said, pirates can not defeat ninjas."

"Argh that's right...My mistake." Barbosa unzipped himself again and standing before them all was a man of mystery.

"Yeah baby." He grinned in his hippee spy clothes, flashing them yellow and crooked teeth.

"Who are you?" Will and Jack asked in unison as the ninja-fangirls began to surround them, forming a perfect fighting circle. Perfect I tell you PERFECT!...

well you all know who that was at the end...i hope... Austin Powers maybe if you couldn't firgure it out. If anybody wants more goofy-ness to this odd story just say so. If not then ha! I don't care either way. mwahahahahaahaha!!!!


End file.
